10 Things I Learned From My Break With Social Media…

The Back Story

A few months ago, I was going through a “digging up the dirt phase” in my life. Have you ever been there? You know, becoming self aware of some patterns and mindsets that keep repeating themselves that you know are just not serving you well?

At this age in my life, I’m accepting something can be done about it. After all, I’ve been an adult for 15 years now. Time to suck it up buttercup. Decided it was time to grab the shovel and dig away that excess dirt to expose those roots and make a change.

About this time, our small group was doing a study by Bob Goff, “Love Does”. Bob talked about how he quits something every Thursday to make room for whatever God wants to put there. Of course, I was confused for a minute, because my over achiever self could not get passed the word “quit”, but I started to understand it was a healthy letting go of something, even if just temporarily.

So the question came up, what distractions do you need to remove to help you in this digging process?

The answer was abundantly clear for me – social media.

I’ve been on social media for 14 years, back when Facebook was just for college students and you had to have a university email to even get it. Social media OG right here! Never did I consider breaking up with it for a bit.

Making the Decision

I decided (on a Thursday, Bob) that it would just be for a week. Here was my “announcement” post about my plans to get off for a while (you know, it only seemed fitting to share my plans for a break on the one thing I was breaking from… the irony)

I then deleted the apps from my phone to avoid temptation or a slip of the finger.

My 10 Discoveries

1. I had way more time than I thought I did. It is amazing what you can fill in the gap when you aren’t watching 3-5 minute videos of dogs or people falling, or my weakness: singing talent shows with stories that make you blubber like a baby. Several three to five minute spans adds up, folks. That’s not even including the “scroll” time.

2. I admitted to having an addiction. I can’t tell you how many times daily, if not hourly, I picked up the phone to scroll and check notifications. That first week was a serious eye opener. I’m not a smoker, but it made me think of one trying to quit and not knowing what to do with their hands. First step is awareness, right?

3. It seemed like everybody was always on their phones. You don’t notice it when you are, too. Honestly, being on the other end felt weird, like “hey, umm, I’m right here. Want to chat with a real face to face person?” Of course NO judging here… please don’t feel paranoid with your phone around me. I know I will still be guilty of this. It was purely an eye opener. I could almost hear the words of others… “they see me scrolling…. they hatin” (now the song is stuck in your head for those who get that reference – you’re welcome)

4. I filled my cup up more. Now that I wasn’t spending all my free time on social, I filled it with other things instead: audiobooks that were good for my soul, (trying to) teach myself guitar, playing with my kids and even journaling again.

5. I slept better. I actually went old school and read before going to sleep versus scrolling, which helped me relax my mind leading to much better sleep. Plus, reading makes me sleepy after so long. Don’t act like you’ve never said you were going to check your notifications one last time (at 10pm), and look up to see it is now 1am.

6. I was more present. I didn’t have to worry about my kids asking for my attention while I finished watching a video. I felt more engaged in face to face conversations and enjoyed more conversations with my husband and family members.

7. I realized the grass isn’t always greener. I had more personal conversations that led to exposing the fact that social media truly IS a highlight reel. No matter how great things look on the web, we all still have the behind the scenes junk. And it makes us human and more lovable, actually. Realness always wins.

8. I watered my own grass. I started making time to address the changes that I wanted (and needed) to make in my own life instead of numbing myself to “do the work” (because it truly is work) by scrolling and watching videos and so on. To be truly honest, it was the first time I began to learn to rely on and look to God for my validation and affirmation versus likes, loves, and comments from people. My walk definitely has grown stronger and this one thing was the greatest of all.

9. I had a wake up call to friendship. I realized I spent more time keeping up with the lifestyles of my social media friends that I don’t even have phone numbers for, than being in authentic connection and communication with my friends that I do. Ouch. (Told you digging isn’t always pretty)

 10. It made me miss the simpler days. Yep. I got a little homesick for the 90’s. When we all talked around the dinner table, with no distractions. Or friends picked up the phone and met in person. Neighbors had each other over to spend time together, face to face connecting, while their kids played and yes … wait for it … this happened on weeknights, not just weekends planned out four months in advance. (Somebody call the bed time police, I know) I’d like to think we all turned out okay.

Conclusion

My week turned into almost two months. I truly enjoyed the experience.

I would highly recommend taking a week (or more) off from social media to anyone who just needs some extra peace in their life.

Disclaimer: If you do said social media hiatus, be prepared because people WILL assume something is terribly wrong. While I know it came from a place of caring and I LOVE these people so, I was surprised as to how many people checked in making sure my family, my marriage, and I were okay.

Be prepared to face some eye opening moments yourself. You may not like some of your revelations, but I promise life still exists on the other side and you may find, like I did, it is actually a super peaceful experience!

Would love to hear your takeaways, if you do!